Thursday, February 4, 2010

Jesus and the Democrat

A funny read I just had to share! Thanks to Joe The Mom for making me LOL for real!


A Republican in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?" The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.

The next patron to come in was a Libertarian with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?" The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there, honey! How's about gettin' me a cold glass of Miller Light?" He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over there?" The waitress once more nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold glass of beer. "On my bill," he said.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said,"For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength comeback into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door. Jesus also passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, "For your kindness,you are healed." The Libertarian felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.Then Jesus walked towards the Democrat. The Democrat jumped up and yelled,"Don't touch me!! I'm collecting disability!"

Saturday, January 30, 2010

The GOP Offering Smart Solutions

Offering Smart Solutions

COMMON-SENSE HEALTH CARE REFORMS OUR NATION CAN AFFORD GOP Healthcare Alternative provides affordable access to all Americans, instead of mandating a one-size-fits-all health system. Including a summary and text of House GOP Health Care Reform Bill and numerous fact sheets.

Ten Reasons to Support the GOP Health Care Reform Bill

Side-by-Side Policy Comparison of Pelosi Health Care Bill & GOP Alternative

The American Energy Act promotes affordable energy, more well-paying jobs, energy independence, and a cleaner environment.

The GOP No-Cost Jobs Plan stops wasteful spending and tax hikes, helps small businesses, and removes unnecessary barriers to American energy production.

The GOP Budget controls the national debt, does not raise taxes, and achieves lower deficits than the President's.

Rush Limbaugh's Letter to Obama

Rush Limbaugh's Letter to Obama



Thanks to Teresamerica for this!

Posted using ShareThis

Thursday, January 28, 2010

2010 State of the Union speech - comments and comedy

On it's face, Obama's speech seemed to have some good ideas but I can't for the life of me think of how these things will be funded ESPECIALLY with a government spending freeze in 2011: help for student loans by not really paying them back, double exports over the next 5 years (not sure what we're going to double, but not a bad goal at all), high speed railroad only in FL with union workers, cut taxes for small business, money paid back by the banks from the stimulus (that we all hated) but the money is being *uhm...* redistributed to "community" banks for small business loans, a new stimulus *cough* I mean job bill, "no lobbyists" when there are how many already in office, clean energy, *gasp* even mention of offshore areas for oil/gas development.

I'm sorry Mr. President, but it's not that health care reform is not being "explained well enough." It really isn't. It's that a lot of us Americans don't agree on what is in these endless pages in these bills that spend SO MUCH MONEY THAT WE DON'T HAVE TO SPEND. Handing out health insurance like candy can't work any better the medicare/medicaid. We aren't stupid just because we don't agree with you! Just because you WANT IT doesn't mean you have THE ONLY ANSWER. And instead of trying to cram it down our throat, how about YOU reach across the asile and work with the other side to compromise! Because 'NEWS FLASH' it's an election year and if you all continue to not listen, we will elect someone who will.


Here's an amusing take on Obama's SOTU speech.


Thanks Randy's Right for this hilarious song: ROLMAO The Day ObamaCare Died – Sung by Barack Obama



Sarah Palin's take on the SOTU speech. The Credibility Gap


Here's to Glenn Beck for keeping our eyes open! State of the Stupid, er, Union

Monday, January 25, 2010

A Fable Retold Anew

THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER
Two Different Versions! Two Different Morals!


OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!


MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

CBS, NBC , PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing, 'It's Not Easy Being Green.' Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing, 'We shall overcome.' Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity & Anti-Grasshopper Act retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote in 2010

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Sarah Palin Will Speak at First National Tea Party Convention - Sphere News

Sarah Palin Will Speak at First National Tea Party Convention - Sphere News

Big Bird Disses Obama

Ha-ha!

I borrowed this awesome and hilarious clip here. Thanks TeresAmerica!